Just for Fun - Rainy Day Activities Part I

Rain or shine, sun or snow, I feel like on most days, I am trying to think of activities for my preschooler.  We usually do something out of the house in the morning and he has "quiet time" in the afternoon, but there are still lots of pockets of time to fill - after breakfast, and before dinner, for example.  We play board games, watch PBS shows and play tic-tac-toe, but some days, it isn't enough!

This "Just for Fun" blog will be devoted to a fun activity that you and your kid(s) can do around your house, and you should have all the equipment that you need.

Today, my son and I made a book (sort of.)  I found a white binder I hadn't used since I attended meetings oh so long ago.  I took computer paper and three-hole punched a bunch of pieces.  Our book was called "Anything Alphabet."  My son is obsessed with the alphabet and writing words and "Anything Alphabet" is a game we usually play on his Doodle-Pro.  I always wish that we could save his Doodle-Pro pictures, so this was a perfect solution. 

The first page was a title page that I made and slipped into the front of the binder.  Then, we went through each letter and he picked a word (sometimes I helped to think of a good one) and then he drew the word and the picture.  He also did a "The End" page where we wrote the entire alphabet with his name.

My plan is to continue making "books" and adding them to this binder.  His other favorite game (that he created) is called "Stinky Alphabet."  I think we will do that next.  I can't imagine what pictures he will draw!

Toddler Advice - Getting Your Child to Eat "Growing Foods"

Almost every mom has stressed about getting their child to eat certain foods.  I have a friend whose daughter loves vegetables, but won’t eat fruit!  My son has always loved fruit, but for the longest time, would not eat most veggies and never chicken or beef. 

I talk to a lot of my mom friends when I have a dilemma.  For this issue, I asked all the moms I know to give me good ideas that worked for them.  How do you get your child to eat those dreaded “growing foods?”

1. Use toothpicks – stack 3 things on a toothpick.  For example, cut up small squares of tortilla, then put a small piece of ham, and then a square of cheese.  Stick a toothpick in it and call it “Tortilla Squares.”
2. Mini wraps – wrap a square of cheese around an asparagus tip.  Also works with a piece of deli meat.
3. Ketchup – make a smiley face out of ketchup on child’s plate.  My son loves tilapia with ketchup.  Whatever works!
4. Smoothies – put frozen veggies in the blender with your favorite smoothie ingredients (frozen yogurt, fresh or frozen strawberries and a banana.)  You really can’t taste the veggies!
5. Cookie cutters – my son loves when ne make “moon sandwiches.”  I cut the bread and the cheese in a crescent moon shape and then add some ham or turkey.
6. Don’t ever say your child can have a treat if they eat their veggies (or any growing food.)  BUT, if he wants a second piece of cheese, bread, etc, then tell him he has to eat two bites of broccoli first.
7. Once in a while, have “same color meals.”  Make omelets with pineapple and yellow squash as your sides.
8. If you hide pureed veggies in your Sloppy Joes (a la Jessica Seinfeld), make sure to also put a side of the veggie on your child’s plate. 

The tips above easy and fun ideas for you to try.  But the most important tips I can give you, now that my 4 ½ year old eats almost anything (after being INCREDIBLY picky for 2 years or so,) is, don’t give up.  It is true that if your child sees it enough times, they will try it.  And give them plenty of variety every night.  And make sure they see you eating it.  AND, it is OK if they go without dinner a few times a week until they learn that they get what they get and if they don’t eat it, they’ll go hungry!

Do you have a great tip that worked for you?  Let me know and I will add it to this post!

Just for Fun - My Summer Reading List 2011

I am in a great book club that reads a lot of thought provoking books.  In addition to the book club book, I read 2-3 others a month.  I love getting suggestions from friends, and even more, I love giving suggestions of good books to read.  I enjoy reading historical fiction and memoirs, but also the occasional "beach read" which means it is easy and fast.

Whether you are an avid reader, or just need to find a book for your summer vaca, here are my suggestions.

My All-Time Faves:

Memoirs of a Geisha

Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil

Cutting for Stone

Outlander (8-book series)

The Help

Water for Elephants
The Forbidden Garden

Memoirs:
Angela's Ashes
The Glass Castle
Left to Tell: Discovering God Amidst the Rwandan Holocaust

Historical Fiction:

The Paris Wife

The Other Boleyn Girl

The Apothecary's Daughter

Girl with the Pearl Earring

Thought-provoking:

Mudbound
House Rules

The Hours

White Oleander

Classics:

Frankenstein

Wives and Daughters

The Beautiful and Damned

A Moveable Feast

1984

Animal Farm

Just for Fun:

Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood

Secret Life of Bees

Bridget Jones' Diary

Valley of the Dolls

Hunger Games (3-book series)

Twilight (4-book series)

Harry Potter (7-book series)

Girl with the Dragon Tattoo (3-book series)

Any Chelsea Handler book

All the Fun Books I Hope to Read this Summer:

Bossypants

Stories I only Tell my Friends

Lies Chelsea Handler Told Me

Place of Yes

Do you have a suggestion for me?  Please let me know, I love a good book! 

Happy Summer Reading!!

Family Advice - Nutrition: Going Organic & All-Natural, Make Small Changes!

I recently visited my friend Sara who is UBER healthy.  She makes every effort to eat organic, well-balanced meals, and she shops "local" as often as possible.  Every time I see her, I roll my eyes at her obsession with food (she eats figs dipped in almond butter for breakfast!)  But once I get home, and process (ie weed out) her suggestions, I always take a few of them to heart.

I am an "everything in moderation" mom.  I try my hardest not to buy anything with hydrogenated oil (a chemically processed fat source) or high fructose corn syrup (a hidden form of sugar derived from corn, found in MANY products).  I buy organic for some things, and I limit my son's intake of sugar.  But I also realize that he will always get that sucker open from the hairdresser before I can stop him.  And if he goes to a birthday party and has grocery store birthday cake, that's OK, because it has to be.  I certainly can't tell him he can't eat cake with his friends.  And other parents might snub me if I brought a healthy alternative for him!  

I decided that I would share a few things I have learned from Sara, as well as what I have learned after reading up on " going organic," plus suggest small things you can do to better your family's daily nutrition.  And I'll conclude with my grocery store adventures.  I go to 3-4 different stores a week!

First, are you overwhelmed by the thought of "going organic?"  I still fret at the price of organic produce!  Never fear, it is better (for your sanity) to do it gradually anyway.  Here are the top suggestions on what to buy organic next time you are at Whole Paycheck... I mean Whole Foods.  Google any of the things listed below for a more detailed explanation.

1. These fruits and veggies are believed to have the highest level of pesticides - apples, grapes, pears, strawberries, nectarines, peaches, cherries, spinach, celery, potatoes, carrots, tomatoes and leafy greens.

2. Raisins, Ketchup & Peanut Butter - raisins should be thought of as just like grapes, organic ketchup has much higher levels of antioxidants and the peanut starts as a flower which can often have mold on it, which is treated with a fungiside.

3. Milk - most adults drink small servings of milk, but families are switching to organic because they worry about their kids having future effects from the antibiotics, artificial hormones and pesticides used in the commercial dairy industry.

4. Meat - after watching Food, Inc. (LOVED it, please watch it!) I now buy only grass-fed, hormone free beef and air-chilled, hormone free chicken.

5. Coffee - many of our coffee beans are produced in countries that have not yet begun to regulate use of pesticides.

What about "all-natural?"  This is the first thing I did alter once my son was born.  I buy Annie's Cheddar Bunnies instead of Goldfish, for example.  Read labels!  Stay away from anything with hydrogenated oil or corn byproducts.  Unfortunately, there are a ton of different names for corn byproducts.  The two most common I have seen are high fructose corn syrup which is a sweetener and xanthan gum which keeps a product's ingredients from separating (like salad dressing.)  Others include corn syrup, cornstarch, glucose and dextrose.  Why do you need HFCS in Heinz ketchup?  Surely when Heinz was invented in 1876, it was "all-natural."  Have you noticed the NEW product, called "Simply Heinz?"  It is Heinz ketchup without HFCS.  Manufacturers ARE listening to us! 

Another thing to keep in your back pocket is “fresh is always better.”  Cut up an apple for a snack rather than a fruit roll-up.  Put out organic mini carrots with “dipping sauce” which can be homemade hummus or quick and easy “ranch.”  (see very bottom of this article for EASY hummus recipe.)

And finally, what are some easy things you can do in your kitchen to cook and bake healthier?

1. Use olive oil - if a recipe calls for butter or vegetable oil, use olive oil instead

2. Use coconut oil - this is a great substitute for butter.  Whether in baking, on toast, or added to your oatmeal, coconut oil is a "god fat."  It comes in a jar, hard as a rock, so skim some off with a spoon and microwave to liquid form, then measure.

3. Use honey - cut the sugar in your cookie recipe in half and use sugar.  OR, if you are Sara, take out the sugar completely and use only honey.

4. Eat almond butter over peanut butter - almonds are a much better fat source than peanuts.  If you can't give up your PB, make sure you buy all-natural or organic.  The Reduced Fat PB has high-fructose corn syrup and the peanut flowers were probably treated with pesticides.

5. Find great web sites with easy, kid-friendly, healthy meals like www.weelicious.com, my personal favorite!

You want to live as long as possible.  You want to instill good eating habits in your kids.  And raising good, healthy children is your most important job in life.  So if it takes a little longer to find healthy recipes, or if it costs a little extra money to eat organic or all-natural foods, do it.  Or start to do it.

And if want to keep reading, listed below are the grocery stores I shop at and some of the healthy items I buy (as cheap as possible!)  The last two are local to Omaha, my current hometown.

Trader Joe’s – I get a lot of my son's treats there (I think it is important for him to not feel deprived at home and therefore want to binge on treats at a friend’s house.)  We get the all-natural vanilla cookies there and the all-natural graham crackers.  I also like their Mac-N-Cheese (more flavorful than the Annie’s that he used to eat.  And CHEAPER.)  I also get the chicken nuggets and tilapia fish nuggets there.  He LOVES all the typical kid food, so I try and do it in moderation and buy healthy brands.  My husband and I love the hummus and kettle corn from Trader Joe’s.  And the Irish steel cut oats are sooo cheap.  I do read labels at Trader Joe's, after seeing that their salad dressing contained Xanthan gum.

Whole Foods – this is sooo pricey!  But I love the fresh meats and chickens, plus I get the organic hot dogs there with whole wheat buns.  And I am personally obsessed with their chicken salad but that is exorbitant, so that is once in a while.  I get the 365 Peanut Butter and 365 Raisins there too.  Some things ARE cheaper there like quinoa, raw nuts and organic yogurt.

Target – I think the only thing we get there is the Annies Natural Cheddar Bunnies (a substitute for Goldfish.)

Wal-Mart – believe it or not!!  They have GREAT prices on organic cereals, yogurts (Yo Baby for example) and the Elmo cookies are super cheap (in baby aisle.)  I also get our jam there (it is the 100% fruit kind by Polaner.)  I also get 100% Maple Syrup there.  They also have Amy’s Frozen foods (veggie lasagna is good.)

Hy-Vee – I get my son's apple juice there.  Hy-Vee is the only place that has a large-sized jug of “Not from Concentrate” AJ.  It is made by Musselman’s.  Even Whole Foods 365 is from concentrate.  I also like a few of the products in the Health Market by Amy’s and Annie’s.  We also love the Indian Curry Sauce (Patak’s is the brand.)  We get the Smart Chicken there and the white turkey made by Honeysuckle.  After watching Food, Inc. (which I was surprised that I LOVED) I have become crazy about what meats/chicken/fish to buy.  

Wohlner’s – this is in Aksarben and is family owned.  We love their bread, bagels and AMAZING frozen pitas.  But I get all our lunch meat there because there are no nitrates in the brand that they carry (Boar’s Head.)  Broadmoor in Countryside also has Boar’s Head, but it is more $$.  Wohlner’s also has fish flown in every day.

Easy Hummus:

Combine the following in a blender or food processor-
chick peas/garbonzo beans (1 can, rinsed and drained)
tahini (2 tbsp)
EVOO (3 tbsp)
garlic (2-3 cloves)
lemon juice from half a lemon

Preschooler Advice - Learning to Count, Write, Spell, Read, ETC.

Every preschool director will tell that the key to getting 3 and 4-year olds to learn is through play.  Many preschools set up learning centers around the room.  You’ll walk in and see a kitchen, a reading area, maybe a dress-up area, an art easel and a sensory table.  And believe it or not, all of these centers are helping to teach your child how to do fundamental, but beginner things like counting, sorting and reading.

So what can you do at home to supplement what’s going on 2-3 mornings a week for 3 hours a morning?  Make it fun, never call it work and don’t force it if the time isn’t right.  I am using “learning to count” as an example below, but these ideas can apply to anything you want to practice with your kids.

Choose something your child loves and thrives at.  For example, if she loves puzzles, get her one with numbers and then sit on the floor and do it with her.  Count out the number puzzle pieces as she puts them in the slots.  Or does she like to sing and dance?  Buy a CD with counting or just play background music and make up counting songs.  Maybe you say "ONE alligator!" and then she yells "TWO lions" and you name it the Animal Counting Game.

With my son, he brought us his tubby numbers (the foam letters that stick on the bath tub wall) and
asked us to show him how to draw them.  We had his easel in the dining room at the time and we just did it a million times a day.  And his other love is books so we would count with number books.  He also loves workbooks so I have bought tons at various stores including Wal-Mart, Target, Walgreens and The Dollar store.

The other key is you'll need some one-on-one time with her, but don't tell her "now we're going to work on numbers."  Just make it play time like any other day.  Or while your cooking dinner, ask her to hang out with you in the kitchen and do a sing-song game.  We also do this a lot after dinner as well.  My son loves to play on our bed and the latest thing he is into is rhyming, so we play "Rhyme Time."  He says "bed, fed."  Then I say "dog, frog."  We used to play a number game, then an “Animal Alphabet” game we made up, and now it is a LITTLE more advanced with rhyming.

And when you’re child starts to show an interest in reading, buy the BOB Books, and ask me for more advice!

Toddler Advice - Bedtime Tantrums, Make it Stop!

I just received this question from a dad via email, and figured I would share it here.  I am sure LOTS of parents out there can relate!

Hey Mommy Wisdom, do you have experience with bedtime tantrums? Sure, what parent doesn’t, right? Just wondering if you had any secrets. My almost 15-month old daughter can be a lot of fun during the day but is so damn stubborn at night - she sleeps through the night most of the time, but getting her down is the tough part. We’ll start around 8pm, she will scream and we go back in with the unfinished bottle once or twice, then she’ll finally give up at like 9:30. I am more into letting her cry it out, but one of us always ends up going back into her room wondering - is she still hungry, does she have to poop, is a new tooth coming in...?  One other thing that I’ll mention is she has just recently gone from 2 naps to 1.

Where do I begin?  I have so much to say!  Going from 2 naps to 1 is hell and would definitely cause upheaval.  I remember my son eliminated his morning nap very gradually, but it started at 14 months.  He didn’t totally give up his morning nap until about 17-18 months.  And even then, if in the car around 12:30pm, he would fall asleep.  He gave up naps altogether a year ago at the age of 3.5, it also took 6 months, and still, if he is in the car at 4:30pm, he’ll fall asleep!!!

I wouldn’t go back to 2 naps, but you could do it gradually.  Like give her a morning nap 3 days a week depending on mom’s schedule and your daughter’s mood.  OR, you could skip morning nap completely, but do her afternoon nap earlier.  For example, if your ideal afternoon nap starts at 1pm, for one week, have her go down at 11am (know that the time from nap wake up and bed will be hell).  Then, the next week, 11:30, then the next week 12, etc, until she is napping at 1pm without being overly tired at lunch time. 

Sooo, even though we probably know the cause of the bed time tantrums, that doesn’t mean they should be happening or you should be playing into them.  Now here is where the tough love comes in.  SHE’S NOT A BABY ANYMORE!  It doesn’t matter if she has a poopy diaper, is hungry or has a tooth coming in.  All these things will happen periodically and she’ll survive until morning!  Or she should at least be able to fall asleep with those things.  If she gets up in the night, that is when I would wonder about those things.  Just wait, she will be going to bed hungry a lot once she is a picky pre-schooler!

Bedtime is bedtime, let her cry it out!  And when I say that, I don’t mean that you totally ignore her crying for two hours.  Not yet anyway!  If it were me, I would go in every 10-15 minutes, not pick her up, and say the same exact thing every time.  “Isabella, it is bed time.  You need to go to sleep now.  Mommy/Daddy is going to leave now, I want you to get your rest.  I love you (pat, pat the back.)  Goodnight.”  And do that every 15 minutes until she falls asleep (and say it before she goes down that first time too). 

And if you do it for an hour plus, and she gets MORE agitated, then it isn’t working, and I would spread out the amount of time in between each of your visits (maybe let her cry for 20-30 minutes.)  And if that doesn’t work, then I would let her cry it out until she falls asleep and not go in at all.  My pediatrician would tell you to do this from the get go – he told me that when his daughter was about 2, she would cry to him from her crib and actually said something like “daddy, why don’t you love me.”  And he wouldn’t go in at all!! 

She CAN manipulate at this age.  And so try and tell yourself that by hugging her, feeding her, etc. you are doing her a disservice – this helped me a lot when I was in a similar situation with my son.  She needs to learn to self-soothe because this will go on (or come and go) FOREVER.  I just went through a phase with my son who is 4.  He would come into our room several nights a week to give us an update on things – like tell us he was going to go the bathroom.  OR, he would even come in just because “he loves us so much.”  Talk about manipulation!!!!! 

And the last thing I’ll mention, and this is my opinion of course, but based on experience, 8pm is too late for her bedtime.  Now if 8pm is the only option because of your work schedule, then you’ll just have to power through this until she gets used to her days with just one nap. 

Even when my son was taking 2 naps a day, he went to bed BY 7pm.  Of course, he has always been an early riser, but still, I think under 2 should be in bed at 7, 7:30pm at the latest.  She is obviously over tired from not taking 2 naps – which is fine.  It will just be that way until she gets used to it, which could take 3-6 months.  But another option, if all the above ideas fail, you could try an earlier bed time for a week and see if her tantrums subside. 

Just remember, every phase is very, very gradual.  She will get used to her new routine, don't expect any of these ideas to work over night.  BUT, also, keep in mind that your CHILD is no longer a baby, she is a little evil genius!!!  So, buck up, and show her some tough love.  She’ll thank you for it some day!

Toddler Advice - Coming into your room at night!

A mom of a 2.5 year old boy recently came to me with a dilemma, one I had experienced with my own son.  Her child comes into her room every night around 2 or 3 in the morning, wanting to snuggle with her for a few minutes.  He falls back asleep right away, then she takes him back to his bed, and he sleeps through the rest of the night.  BUT, she doesn’t.  The act of taking him back to his room keeps her up for a couple of hours.  She wanted advice on how to get him to STAY in his bed from the get go.  Here is my reply to her.

I have been here from time to time with my son, and as someone who needs a lot of sleep, it can be miserable!  Here are your four options to deal with this dilemma.  Using a lock or gate, a sticker chart, a special goodnight clock or having a rational conversation with your child.  I think that using a gate or lock is premature at this point.  It could definitely come to that, but at this point, it would confuse him and possibly upset him since it IS kind of a punishment.  And right now, you are welcoming him into your bed for the snuggle, so he wouldn’t understand the lock/gate.  And therefore it wouldn’t work.  I also think the sticker chart and clock could work for him, but I think the first thing to try is the rational conversation.

Here are the steps to take:

1. Since you and your husband both take part in bedtime, you each need to do this every night at the end of your bedtime routine.  You say the exact same thing to him, every night – “Max, you have been coming into mommy’s bed in the middle of the night.  But it is very important for Max to sleep in his bed, and mommy to sleep in her bed.  We both get very tired when you wake up in the night.  So tonight, I want you to try your hardest to stay in your own bed.”  (side note – I do think leaving the door open with the bathroom light on might help this too.)  And that’s all you say before kissing him goodnight and leaving.
2. Then, he will probably still come into your room at the same time (2 or 3am).  You must immediately say similar words.  “Max, remember what mommy said?  It is important for you to sleep in your bed and mommy to sleep in her bed.  We both get very tired when you wake up in the night.  Let’s go back to your bed now and I’ll give you a BIG hug and tuck you in.”  Then you do that, WITHOUT letting him into your bed.  And he might come right back in, and he might do it again and again for two hours.  But you MUST stand your ground.  And I would do this for two weeks.  You have to break this current routine with him with this middle of the night snuggle, and now it is all about setting a new routine for him.  You’ll be exhausted and crabby, but better to break the habit now!
3. If that doesn’t work, I would move on to the sticker chart.  He is a little young for it, but you can try, if the above fails.  Buy an 11x14 piece of brightly colored poster board and then draw in colorful markers at the top “Max’s Sticker Chart.”  (it is horizontal.)  Then, you make about four rows with a ruler that will be about three inches tall.  And you buy about three different packs of kiddy stickers.  And you tape the poster board to the outside of his door, at his eye level.  Make sure to keep the stickers out of his reach, but always in the same place.  And you put one sticker on it, in row one.  And you tell him that this is his very special sticker chart.  And every time he stays in his bed from bed time until morning, he gets one sticker.  And if he can get 5 stickers (or 3 or 7, whatever you want), he gets a NEW book!!!  And you have a supply of books hidden and he gets to pick one from a special drawer or wherever.
4. And if he messes up, and comes into your room, say the same words you have been saying every time he comes into your room.  Then, the next morning, you take him to the chart and explain that you are starting a new row b/c he came into your room.  Maybe he already has three stickers in row one, then you put a new sticker on a new row, and explain he is starting over with his goal of getting a NEW book (or a new toy, whatever you think will motivate him.)
5. You could also do the goodnight clock in conjunction with the sticker chart.  Tell him that if he comes into your room before “sunny bunny” is up, he won’t get a sticker.  I think that this clock is better suited for a child of about the age of three, but this process could take that long!  You know your child best and probably know if the clock and sticker chart would be effective or maybe too overwhelming.

Goodnight clock that we use, and we call the bunny “Sunny Bunny.”

http://www.onestepahead.com/catalog/product.jsp?productId=536615&cmSource=Search

Remember, kids love routine.  Sometimes, they create or add something to their routine that us parents don’t want.  It is our job to alter their routine so we all can have the best possible day.  Kids need to eat right and SLEEP WELL!  Sometimes, this means being a little stricter than is in our nature.  But just keep in mind that kids look to their parents for this stability.

Good luck and let me know what works for you and Max!